While I was reading up on various ways about how to baby proof your house, I ran across several things that I considered to be overkill and just plain silly. Once I had decided how much baby-proofing I thought I should do, I realized this is a great opportunity to write a fun post of the more ridiculous suggestions that I found in the process. Although I believe these points are overkill, it is just my opinion and you have to use your own judgment- “please don’t check your common sense at the door.”
How to baby proof your house:
#10 Corner Guards- I can understand wanting to pad sharp corners in the nursery (if you have any-I don’t) but everywhere else seems silly to me. My baby is learning to walk right now and has been cruising the living room furniture quite well. Occasionally she falls and bumps her head, but it’s not a big deal.
#9 Stove Guard– This sounds like an important safety feature for baby-proofing but I think it would just give parents a false sense of security in the kitchen. Instead, I would rather keep the kitchen completely off-limits to the baby unless I am in their paying close attention to her. This is especially true for when I am cooking if the baby is with me I stay by the stove and keep my eye on her at all times.
#8 Hot Water Indicators- What’s wrong with just using your elbow to test the bath water as many professionals suggest- oh I know, because you don’t spend frivolous money doing it that way. I have never needed a temperature gauge for my baby’s bath time and I have never scalded her yet.
#7. Potted Plant Guard– I know that this product just makes life easier for parents, but that’s not what parenting is about. Sometimes you have to go along the more difficult path to achieve the desired outcome. In this case, the desired outcome is a well-disciplined child. I want to raise my baby to have respect for other peoples things and my authority. I don’t want to protect everything from her destruction just because she does not know how to obey.
#6. Door Pinch Guard- Once when I was a little girl I got my finger caught in a door, and it really hurt. I quickly got over it and I learned not to stick my finger in places it doesn’t belong. I hate to see my baby cry just as much as any other parent, but I know that she has to learn and I can’t completely shelter her from life.
#5. Refrigerator Locks– Since the baby can’t kill herself from anything in my refrigerator and I only keep her in the kitchen if I am with her, this seems completely unnecessary to me. Actually, I think it is really a device to test the patience of parents because I know I would get annoyed with it really quickly.
#4. Toilet Seat Locks– If the last product was meant to test my patience, this one is meant for torture. When you HAVE to go in the middle of the night, do you really want to turn the lights on so you can fumble with a latch while trying not to pee? There is not a whole lot I can accomplish when I am groggy from sleep, and I’m pretty sure this would have me beat.
#3. Baby-Proofing Books– In all of the research I have done on baby-proofing, I found so much more information than I would normally think of on my own that I don’t see why anybody would want to spend money on a book. If you can find the information free, then buying baby-proofing books is a complete waste of money- unless you just enjoy reading them for some strange reason.
#2. Baby-Proofing Professional– Another waste of money in my opinion. Why do Americans constantly try to suppress their own common sense and better judgment? If you just consider what all your baby can physically do, then you can figure out what would be dangerous around the house. I know very well how terribly hazardous my house is, and I didn’t have to ask a professional to figure that out.
#1. Baby-Proofing Classes– This is worse than hiring a professional because with the previous point you at least have the excuse of being too lazy to do it yourself. Common sense and clutter control are my main ways to baby-proof, along with the First Aid and CPR class I took a while back. If you are that adamant about baby-proofing, use that time to declutter your house and search the internet for more information. I sure hope you didn’t shell out cash along with your wasted time for those classes.
If you enjoyed this post then you will love my most popular post “3 Tips for baby proofing kitchen,” check it out if you haven’t read it yet.
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